I Know My Rights!

From the journal of Namor the Mariner, Bastia:

Oct 19: Spent some time with the new rowers. Went over the Wither Bill and made some of the easier repairs. Looks like some bits of hull need replacing, along with much of the rigging and sails. Also need to fill out the crew. Man, we need cash.

Others of the Jolly Rogers dug up ghost stories about the Shadow, a ghost ship that haunts the area around Flotsam Island. New arrivals swear they were chased by the fairy tale. I'm not sold.

Hollander, our liaison with Bastia's leadership, lets us know about a weird cabin and cave nearby. Offering a reward in cash and a magic item to investigate. Now we're talkin'.

Oct 20: We plan out our tasks. Talk to a local animal trainer and learn some common commands for Keek war dogs. Buy some meat and peanut butter, make little snack packets for the dogs. Once we save the countryside from the canine menace, we'll move on to the cave.

Talk to the hunter that found the cave. He is terrified of it and loves us, hands us a perfectly drawn map. This Morgan chick opens all kinds of doors.

We set off after the dogs.

Patrol stops us outside of Bastia, abuses their authority, informs me I will be searched. I bare steel and dare Sgt Fife to put hands on me. It's a pretty tense stand off but Barney's all bluster and he moseys on. I can tell he's going to be a problem. For a little while, anyway.

I'm able to locate the dogs' tracks, but we're running out of daylight. Make camp.

Overnight the biggest weasel that's ever been seen tries to steal some rations, but Morgan shoos it away like the trespassing rodent that it is. I was reasonably sure she was about to die but it just scurried off into the brush.

Oct 21: Track the dogs to a copse of trees. I have an unpleasant demeanor I'm told, so I hang back, let Morgan and Sabo the dwarf approach with the treats and command words. Of course the dogs love Morgan and flock to her. In short order, we scoop up the half dozen pups and the handful of gore-covered war dogs and head back to town. We have to camp again before we arrive but pleasant weather and peaceful sleep make it an easy trip.

Oct 22: Report dog menace heroically defeated. Get our reward. Sell some of the pups, leave the rest with the crew of the Bill, take the adults as added muscle. Set off for the weirdo cave.

We arrive with some daylight left. Strangest site I've ever seen. Busted old cabin right atop a hole in the ground, like it was carved out with rushing water, but no stream or river in sight. Cabin looks from the outside to be a miner's camp. Tools and such. Tracks around of a horse drawn cart tended by a single drover, leads right up to the cave where it unloads and drags something heavy inside.

After some hemming and hawing, I jump through a window to prowl the interior. I panic a little as the party outside disappears and the inside changes to a charnel house of gore. More magic bullshittery. Sabo is a real one, jumps right in after me with his hammer out. The dwarf's alright.

Eventually everyone comes in and we search around. It's clearly some kind of foul ritual chamber that's setting off Basus and Sabo with their ability to Sense Evil. Stairs lead down to a cellar. We can see the cave mouth and a corridor that extends further, clearly a mining shaft, but veins of quartz ignored. Sabo informs us that doesn't make sense.

When we look out the mouth of the cave we can't see our mule, further confirming weird magic bullshit. We carefully prowl down the mining shaft, find a Y, take the left and end up overlooking a ceremonial crypt with an evil altar dominating. We back track and run into a clutch of walking dead blocking our exit.

Sabo rebukes the abominations, Basus, Farland, and I rush forward, and in short order we're huffing and puffing over the hacked apart corpses of miners. Disgusting and if we don't find some gold here quick I'm done.

The other branch of the corridor leads to a storage room of sorts with tools but no treasure. I hate it here. We exit and try to figure out the weird magic of the cabin. If we enter or exit through the cabin, we uh... phase? into some other realm. If we use the cave nothing changes. We exit the cabin back into our realm and decide to lay an ambush for ole boy with the cart.

The Lawfuls want to break the altar which they say is causing all the problems. Hey whatever, but they don't have the supplies they need. Sabo doesn't know the spell and neither of them have holy water. Great. With clear skies and fortuitous moonlight from Celene and Luna, I volunteer to run back to Bastia with a zombie head as proof, see if Hollander can supply us with holy water. He's a preacher of some kind.

I take up an easy lope with my new war dog Davey heeling. We see a creepy little fairy on our way but avoid him. Ain't got no time to sleep for 40 years or some other silly shit. Bastia closes its gates at night, apparently, so I get to banging. Sally port opens and of course it's Sgt Barney Fife of the Dipshit Brigade cussin' me for evil and a criminal and "nothin' good happens past 11pm".

I stick the zombie head in his face and tell him I'm on official business from Hollander and I don't have time for his foolishness. He doesn't believe me and demands I wait in the guardhouse while he sends someone to confirm. I imagine if I didn't have the zombie head I'd be writing this from prison.

I debate pushing this guy further but I'm tired and I'm gonna have to run back, so fine. I flop on a bench, prop my boots on the zombie head, and catch what sleep I can. I fully expect this fucker to waste my time or wake up in a cell or something but little I can do about that now.

They nudge me awake when Hollander arrives, allegedly about an hour later. That's not so bad. I give him the story, show him the head, and beg some holy water, which he creates on the spot. Ok, Hollander's seen some shit, apparently.

Hollander wants the necromancer alive. Uh, knowing Basus and them, that's not likely. That man thinks he's died once already and is quite unstable. I ask for a horse to get back faster and stifle my mirth as Hollander instructs Fife to cough up one of his. Hah, got em. Off I go into the night on a horse Barney is certain that I'm going to steal. I laugh to Davey about that once we're out of earshot.

Oct 23: I arrive predawn, hand over the holy water, and promptly fall asleep.

Once it's light, we go in and Sabo and Basus get to bustin' the altar. Sabo tries some dwarven technique of breaking it with his ass, but looks pretty sore afterward. Basus takes a pickaxe to it. After it's busted, they sprinkle the holy water and the world ends. Or something, reality tears or shifts. Davey and I ain't havin' it, we light out like our asses are on fire. Back in real space it's not so bad but I'm still queasy. Basus wanders out well after the rest and that experience does nothing for his mental state. Beginning to think we've got a madman in the party.

Investigation shows the realms have merged after the altar is busted. Quartz is gone, gore still there, etc. We continue the ambush, waiting for ole boy to come back.

Oct 27: Dude finally shows up with a cart full of corpses. We rush him but I trip and fall on my face and Basus nearly cuts his own leg off. Morgan wings him with an arrow and Farland makes contact with the flat of his blade, but our ambush was embarrassingly ineffective, like the enemy was protected by foul magic. We demand surrender but before we can apply any more encouragement he poofs like a fart in the wind. We search and track around but can't find any evidence, even with the dogs. Dammit.

We head back to Bastia with a cart full of corpses, report on the findings, and collect our reward for destroying the sinkhole of evil. Added to the bit of treasure we found, it wasn't a bad haul. We make plans to catch a ride to Monmurg, sell the little weird flute thing Hollander gave us, and use the profits to outfit the crew and Bill. Maybe we can get on the water soon and explore.